Email With Tips
by CadetAnnie4Jesus
Summary: An email from Tony to Cap giving him some helpful tips for living in our century, how to do smiley faces, and what some texting abbreviations mean. Just a little funnyness. Hoping to add a response soon. Bunny smiley face not working! WAAAAAHHHH!
1. Tony to Cap: Century Starter Blocks

TO: steverogers

FROM: ironman101

Just thought you might need this to help get used to the new century and all that. PS We need to work on your name! I'm thinking Capsicleofawesomeness

**Text Abbreviations:**

LOL= Laugh Out Loud

JK= Just Kidding

GTG= Got To Go

TTYL= Talk To You Later

BF= Boyfriend

GF= Girlfriend

L8R= Later

Cuz= Because

WTF= What The Fuzz

OMG= Oh My Goodness

FYI= For Your Information

ASL = Age/Sex/Location

**Smiley Faces:**

:) = Happy

:D = Super Happy

:( = Sad

:-/ = Confused

: = Angry

:-P= Tongue Sticking Out

:O = Shocked

(\_/)

(")_(") = BUNNY!

**Random Tips:**

Do not buy sushi from a gas station

Ask for cute girls phone numbers

Try avoiding street vendor giving away free food

Force yourself to walk away from pet shops. If you go in most likely you won't be going out alone

Always be prepared when walking with a slice of bread in your pocket. You never know when a rabid pigeon is going to attack you

**How to turn on your TV**

Find the white remote that has a Direct TV sign on it.

Press the button that has on facing toward the TV, and then the receiver (box with circle)

Make sure TV is on input 5

Click Guide, select your channel, and enjoy your brain rotting endless entertainment

**Kitchen Tips**

Put the lid for the blender on BEFORE hitting start.

Never heat plastic in microwave

Never heat marshmallows in microwave

Leftovers should be heated around 1 minute

For emergencies, fire extinguisher located in every room.


	2. Cap's Reply: American Sign Language

TO: ironman101

FROM: steverogers

Thanx ( got that off the internet) for the email. I'm sorry it took so long for me to respond, but it took forever to figure out how to open up the email, more or less discover how to send one. I do have a question though. I was walking down the side walk when I saw a stand that said ASL. I thought it meant Age/Gender(_Using for safety viewers) _/Location, so I went up to them and asked what a sign for Age/Gender/Location means, and the lady running the stand slapped me. I don't understand any of this. Please could you tell me why this lady responded with these actions? Thanx again. Oh, GTG TTYL :)


	3. Tony: ASL Two Meanings

TO: steverogers

FROM : ironman101

HAAAAAALAAAARIOUS! It took me a moment to register what happened, and then I nearly peed in my pants from laughing. It was a good thing I installed a toilet in my armor because of that whole incident in Canada. Goodness Steve, ASL also stands for American Sign Language. It is for deaf people to have a way to communicate to each other. The lady was just probably doing some fundraiser for it or something. The woman just thought you were some crazy weirdo who was flirting on her. OK, you're going to have to tell me what you did. Like, ASAP! Oh wait, that stands for as soon as possible. Got it? Good. L8r.

Tony


	4. Cap to Tony: Ohhhhhh

To: Ironman101

From: Steverogers

Now I feel really embarrassed. When the lady slapped me I stuttered sorry and walked away. There must have been a ton of people around, so now every time someone sees me they're going to think, "Oh, there's the nincompoop who didn't know what American Sign Language was," or "Hey, I wonder how to sign loser in sign language." I am starting to wonder just how good this whole email lesson plan is going. By the way, the new phone you got me, I don't appreciate you changing the home screen to a picture of a unicorn and not telling me how to change it. If I don't get a call from you by tomorrow telling me how to fix it I'm giving you payback the old fashioned way.


	5. Nincompoop and Youtube

TO: Steverogers

From: Ironman101

First off, nincompoop, really. Idiot or dork would of fit better, but this century left nincompoop behind a long time ago. Second, do you really doubt my intelligence. Without my assistance, you could be puking by the side of the rode from gas station sushi, be on fire from leftover spaghetti incident, or be out of your mind wondering how on earth do you turn on the TV! I saved you from a number of things just by sending you one email. Third, you might be right about doubting my intelligence. Look up "Captain Dorkica gets slapped by old lady," on YouTube. Apparently one of the people watching you had their phone video camera on. Sorry about that. On the bright side, it's only the third most popular video right now, so there's a good chance your entire reputation isn't gone. Anyway, considering I am supposed to be teaching you more things about the new century, so I think it's best I give you some homework. I want you to watch the SpongeBob Square Pants Movie. That should introduce you to some new words to describe yourself. Dork! Goofball! Dingaling! Wingnut! Knucklehead McSpazatron! :)


End file.
